Interview with memoirist Harold Phifer

Memoirist Harold Phifer chats with me today about My Bully, My Aunt, and Her Final Gift.

During his virtual tour, Harold will be giving away a $15 Starbucks gift card to a lucky randomly drawn winner. To be entered for a chance to win, use the form below. To increase your chances of winning, feel free to visit his other tour stops and enter there, too!

Bio:
Harold Phifer was born in the rebellious South of Columbus, Mississippi. As a kid, he worked the streets, hustled the neighbors, and bused tables at bars he didn’t belong in. After graduating from Caldwell High School, he went on to earn degrees from Mississippi State and Jackson State Universities. He became an Air Traffic Controller in Memphis, Tennessee, but after 23 years, he sought purpose elsewhere—working as an international contractor alongside soldiers in Iraq and Afghanistan. After narrowly escaping the Taliban takeover in 2021, he took refuge at Guantanamo Bay and resumed his writing while continuing his work as a controller. In 2024, he returned to the Middle East, where he continues to write about life, love, and the human spirit.

Welcome, Harold. Please tell us a little bit about your memoir.
Aunt Kathy made his childhood miserable—now her funeral might just set him free.

In this wickedly funny and deeply honest memoir, Harold Phifer revisits the chaos of growing up under the thumb of a domineering aunt who ruled with twisted wisdom and unpredictable wrath. As he plans her awkward memorial, Hal finds healing in the most unexpected place: her absence. My Bully, My Aunt, and Her Final Gift is a heartfelt journey through trauma, truth, and the strange gifts we inherit from those who hurt us most.

Excerpt from My Bully, My Aunt, and Her Final Gift:
Very few parishioners had vehicles, so she was an easy choice. However, accepting a ride from Aunt Kathy came at a heavy price. Passengers had to endure constant verbal assaults while present in her car. Even Jerry got involved in those character assassinations.

On one occasion, with both Jerry and me crammed in the back seat of Aunt Kathy’s Crown Victoria, along with a big basket of food, which we were forbidden to touch, Aunt Kathy set out to pick up Deacon Hunter.

As soon as the old man settled in, Jerry wasted no time repeating what he had gathered from Aunt Kathy prior to the lift. “You need to get your own car!”

Of course, Aunt Kathy tried to laugh it off and then replied, “Kids say the darndest things. I don’t know where my baby boy got that.”

Do your characters love the direction you take for them or do they have other ideas?
My characters tend to have other ideas. Rarely do I finish a story the same way I envisioned it. There’s always something about that person that stands out and forces me to display their uniqueness.

Any tips on writing that you’d like to share?
Yes! Don’t get too caught up worrying about things like grammar or tense. You can always go back to fix it later. Plus, your editors should repair your manuscript for you.

Did you choose your genre or did it choose you?
No doubt, the genre chooses me. I do go into a story thinking one way and the details drive me almost toward the opposite direction.

Did you enjoy language arts in school? Did you have a teacher who particularly encouraged you to write?
Yes, I enjoyed language arts in school. Most importantly, I did have a teacher in the 6th grade and another in the 11th grade who made me fantasize about writing. Still, it took 40 years for me to try my hand at it.

How do you feel about being interviewed?
I really do enjoy it! It’s a good feeling being able to tell your story. But the best part of my interviews is the gems I lay out that are not included in the book.

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